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Addressing the Problems in Marriage

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Correspondence of Hazrat Moulana Yunus Patel Saheb (rahimahullah)

Letter:

Respected Moulana

My marriage is in problems for a while now. My husband comes home late and wants to be by himself. We have had no family life for the last three years and everything revolves around him. I know he is talking to other women and I have grown to accept it. I just want this marriage to work. Please inform me as to what I may read to create love in his heart so he may want to come home and spend time with me and my children.

Reply:

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem

As Salaamu ‘alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakaatuh

Respected Sister in Islam 

1. You should not allow this matter to continue. There is a serious need for both of you to seek some kind of counselling. Marriage is not living together like two pieces of furniture in the home. 

You should continue to try and win his attention and love, in a way that would please him – within the boundaries of sharee‘ah.

You should also speak to your husband, in a polite manner, about your concerns, your hurt and sadness, as well as the need to build love between the two of you, and make the marriage a success. This naturally requires him to co-operate and also make an effort. If need be, suggest some kind of mediation to solve the problem.

2. Read: Durood Shareef thrice, “Ya Wadoodu, Ya Rahmaanu, Ya Raheemu” once, and Durood Shareef thrice again. 

Blow on some sugar and use that in the tea or whatever you may prepare for him. Also read and blow on the water. All in the family can drink from this.

3. Do also make a lot of taubah and istighfaar from all sins. Perform your 5 times salaah daily and continue with du‘aa.

4. I am also making du‘aa for you.

Was Salaamu ‘alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakaatuh

Yunus Patel (Maulana)