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Ten Steps to Winning his Heart

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Last Updated on Thursday, 28 April 2016 12:19

‘Amr bin Hujr Kindi had sent a proposal to ‘Auf bin Muhallam Shaibaanee asking for the hand of his daughter, Ummu Iyaas, in marriage. On receiving the proposal, the father of Ummu Iyaas, ‘Auf, decided to accept it.

When the night arrived for Ummu Iyaas to leave her parents’ home and depart for the home of her husband, her mother came to her and said, “O my beloved daughter! You are about to leave the home in which you were born and the ‘nest’ which you have now outgrown. You are going to live with a man whom you do not know and a companion with whom you are unfamiliar. You should therefore become his slave girl so that he will, in turn, become your slave. Pay special attention to the following ten aspects as you will find them to be a great resource in assisting you to enjoy a happy marriage: 

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Empty Threats

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Last Updated on Thursday, 21 April 2016 15:56

When parents threaten their children with a certain punishment for misbehaving, provided that the punishment is appropriate and within the limits of sharee‘ah, and the child is deserving, it is essential that they implement the punishment.

While the parent has many functions to fulfil e.g. protector and one showing love, a very important role and function of the parent which serves to develop the child’s discipline and behavior is that of “figure of authority”.

If the parents fail in administering their threat, the child will lose his respect for them as the “figures of authority” in his life. He will view his parents as people who make empty threats because they cannot stick to their word and have a weak resolve. Apart from the harm caused by the child losing respect for his parents, they are further harming him by setting a bad example – the example of somebody who does not keep to their word.

   

The Marriage Carriage

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Last Updated on Friday, 18 March 2016 10:16

Marriage is one amazing journey...

The fuel for the first half of the journey is love while the fuel for the second half of the journey is mercy.

Marriage initially takes off as a beautiful, novel experience in which you enjoy the thrills and frills.

With age, the couple turn over to a new page called “old age” which is certainly not some cold cage. Rather, it is a stage where a sage will wage no rage.

A true couple will happily and carefully work around moments of pain and agony. With patience and intelligence, they will learn to give and forgive, let and forget.

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Rules of a Muslim Home (#11) - Hayaa (Modesty)

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Last Updated on Saturday, 12 March 2016 10:29

Amongst the extremely important rules and etiquettes of a Muslim home is hayaa (modesty/shame).

Hayaa entails the shunning of indecent behaviour and adopting of bashfulness and shame. Allah Ta‘ala blesses a believer with this wonderful quality which prevents him from committing sins. Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) has said, “Every religion has a distinct quality and the distinct quality of Islam is modesty.” (Sunan Ibni Maajah #4182) This means that a Muslim will be clearly identified and recognised from the hayaa that he possesses.

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Causing Moral Decay in our Children

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Last Updated on Thursday, 10 March 2016 15:32

One of the main reasons for the moral decay in many children is that when there is an occasion which demands love and affection, we punish and shout the child, and when the occasion warrants admonition, we show the child love and affection.

Often the child makes a mistake, and on realising his mistake is remorseful and intends to make amends. At this juncture, the child needs our warmth and support. If at such a time instead of supporting the child, one gets angry and reprimands him over his mistake, it may break his spirit and courage to change and rectify himself. In future he will not even consider correcting his mistake as he will think to himself “Whether I change or not, my parents will still shout at me.”

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